Patty meltdown

La Cieca works from time to time with (as dear Zinka would say) “young sinkers,” i.e., aspiring operatic talent. The harsh truth is that the average young artist has about as much chance of winning King Kong Millions as she (the group is overwhelmingly female) does of building a major career. With such an insane level of competition, even getting an audition is considered a coup. In order to improve their chances, singers network obsessively, tweak headshots and repertoire lists, and even attend (expensive) workshops on how to “position” themselves in the market. Once in a while, an artist comes along who defies all the rules, skewers the sacred cows, and laughs in the face of common sense about how to behave with a potential employer. Such an artist is “Patty.” According to La Cieca’s source, the following sound clip is “a real message left by a real auditionee on the voicemail of the director of a real opera company in the midwest.” Here’s Patty.

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7 Responses to “Patty meltdown”

  1. The Tenth Valkyrie Says:

    I just hope that opera director wasn’t remote checking his voicemail by mobile phone from Kuala Lumpur…

  2. Dr. Bartolo Says:

    I’m looking forward to hearing more from Patty. I hear she’s just got the lead in a production of the new opera “Fatal Attraction” after leaving a slimlar message on the director’s machine…

  3. “The call’s coming from inside the house!”
    This woman terrified me.
    Was she auditioning for a part in “the turn of the screw”?

  4. Dr. Bartolo Says:

    Actually, the working title was “Boiling the Bunny”.

  5. Chalkenteros Says:

    “My resume is full … um … but … it’s in pieces right now, I … tore it up, um, out of *rage* because I was … in a fit of rage for some reason …”

    Haven’t we *all* been there before?

  6. Just Another Tenor Says:

    Chalkenteros, I am SO in love with you right now.
    You are just THAT funny!

  7. celticpriestess Says:

    My, my, now I know why I didn’t get those leads in high school and college…I went about it all wrong! 😉 I think Patty’s first lead must have been in a production of “The Bad Seed!” And who knows…she just might get cast as Lady Macbeth somewhere!

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